A Fly on the Wall

I’m currently enjoying my acceptable state plan-free behavior. Do I know where I’ll be living this Christmas? Nope. For my 27th birthday this summer? Negative. I’m currently wait-listed at a phenomenal graduate program in writing, so I may be, if the cosmos align correctly, moving across the country and going through the biggest change of my adult life. Key word: Maybe.

This state of mind has its benefits and pitfalls. For now, it’s exactly what I just said: a state of mind. Very little action is required until I get the green light from the program, therefore I’m left to dream, worry and strategize all kinds of possible scenarios and appropriate reactions in the scene of my unknown future.

Take this evening for example.

After eating a simple dinner made from pantry and refrigerator scraps, I read this New York Time’s article.

I loved it for the reason I love the majority of good macro-cultural journalism. It speaks to the collective conscience and puts what a lot of people are thinking into concise words. I had doomsday thoughts a lot—probably closer to eight months ago more than I have recently; but nonetheless, I found this article aptly timed and of course well written.

It got me thinking again about what I’d do, how I might prepare, and how my life might look, should society begin to crumble. What if I lived in NYC without my partner? Or even if society isn’t hitting the fan, but for whatever reason, I need to operate in more of a survival mode than I am now. My mind began to list some of my favorite simple foods that would keep me nourished in more ways than one. And the top of the list? Poached eggs. There’s something just perfect and romantic about a poached egg atop almost anything.

Alice Waters taught me how to poach eggs this winter and she’s right:
“A freshly laid organic egg simply poached is an incomparable delicacy.” From The Art of Simple Food

Then my sugar addiction kicked in and I was left to forage my pantry yet again. After combining heaping spoonfuls of organic cocoa powder with tablespoons of agave and a few pours of 1 percent milk in a saucepan over low heat, I had myself a new item for my list… hot cocoa. Three ingredients coupled with heat and a pan had me entering a brand new state of mind—utter bliss. The simplistic deep chocolate melted away any care I had at the time. The drug-like effect my cocoa had on me was almost embarrassing; it was so immediate. I could almost visualize the neurons releasing serotonin on my brain.

I may not know where I’ll be living within the next few months, but the more chocolate entered my body, the more okay with it I was.

-Catherine